Chapter Text
Nahri
She was a dead girl floating in the Nile, but she was at peace. She was looking down at herself from above. Stuck in her chest was the ice dagger from the Peris. The sky was bright blue and a gentle breeze rustled the plants on the edge of the great river. The water was strangely clear. The Egyptian Nahid looked pure, like an image inspired by a holy text. Then, everything went dark. She was in her body again, her eyes forced to open as a hand wrenched the dagger from her chest, unleashing a gush of dark maroon blood, so much that the river soon ran red. And the hand belonged to Alizayd Al-Quatani. She could see the scarring left from the Marid running up his forearm. But when she looked into his eyes, the yellow irises melted away to black holes, and he had changed into one of Quandisha’s ghouls. And suddenly she was at the bottom of the river, hundreds of ghouls keeping her anchored. She screamed underwater, releasing her last held breath, many hands seizing and shaking her. Someone called to her from afar.
“Nahri, my light, wake up!” Ali was knelt by her bed, a hand gently encasing her shoulder. She felt herself trembling, her breathing quick. “It’s okay, you’re okay.” He whispered as his hand rubbed her shoulder and back in an effort to soothe her. It wasn’t doing enough, she needed to keep him talking.
“Nightmare.” She exhaled. He nodded. She couldn’t tell what time it was. The moon was high in the sky through her window. She sat up but felt queasy, so laid back down. Ali’s yellow eyes, alive in the dark of her bedroom, traced her every move.
“How did you get in?” She finally asked him, realizing he was waiting for her to either be much calmer or to say something.
“I once knew a very good locksmith who taught me a thing or two,” he smiled and grabbed her hand.
“Ali, you can’t just break into my house in the middle of the night!” She tried to give him a strictly scolding glare, but she was battling her lips to stay frowning.
“I’m sorry but I came by to bring you some news. I was debating whether I should just leave when I heard you, it sounded like you were in distress. How do you feel now?”
She looked up at him and realized he was in his Marid armor, his sickle sword strapped to his back, the moonlight reflecting off it.
“I think I’m starting to calm down. I doubt I’ll be able to go back to sleep for a while. It was a pretty gruesome nightmare.”
“That’s saying a lot coming from you.” Ali’s brow was furrowed in worry, his lips set in a hard frown.
“I take it back, it wasn’t that bad.”
“Nahri, I wish there was something, can’t there be a tonic?”
“It’s fine Ali, thank you for checking on me.” She squeezed his hand. She followed his gaze from her eyes to where she rested her hand across her chest, but he quickly looked away, seeing her thin cotton night dress. He stood up abruptly and then sat back on the floor in the far corner, near the door. Nahri almost scoffed at this, thinking surely he didn’t think she would try to seduce him now of all times. Or maybe he just didn’t trust his own restraint, but she found that harder to believe. Ali had been so careful, so proper with her, for the last five years. There were days when she wondered how much longer they could both stand to wait, and then days where she feared ever changing the dynamic they had created, a safe and simple, loving relationship. She propped herself up on an elbow.
“So what’s the news that you had to share with me after nightfall?” It was rare that she ever saw him after the sunset. The last time was a couple of years ago, when they met to look through his telescope, and the whole thing was so romantic that Ali couldn’t help but kiss her, and she let him. But he was upset afterwards, and set a new boundary of not meeting with her at night.
“Well, you won’t like it. But I know you’d be angrier if I didn’t tell you.” He scratched his head. She waited patiently for him to go on, taking a drink from the carafe at her bedside. He watched her gulp down the water before going on.
“There was a possible Ifrit sighting in the human land near Bir Nabat. I’ve been needing to visit there anyway to check in on the town and the water sources. It would be stupid not to try and track them, or at least trace their movements. It could be Vizaresh. I could get some of the slave vessels-” He stopped as he finally looked up at Nahri as he sensed her movements. She had gotten out of the bed and was pulling her cloak over the night dress. She lit a flame in her bedside lamp and carried it with her out of the room.
“Nahri? Nahri were you listening?” She could hear him stagger to his feet to follow her. She felt a fire roiling in her belly that she wanted to heave up.
“How do you know?” She said simply, her voice emotionless.
“Someone from outer Bir Nabat was killed by a ghoul.” She actually laughed as he chased her down the stairs to the first floor.
“Nahri, I know how it sounds but I have it on a good source-”
“He could be anywhere by now, he could be gone a week ago, all traces likely gone.”
“I have to try. I’m going there anyway. The people are rightfully freaked out, and I want to make them feel safe again, even if I don’t find anything.” Nahri busied herself in the kitchen making tea. Her anger was rising, and she spilled a scoop of tea leaves on the floor. She cursed, knocking over the cup she had set out with her elbow as she reached for a cloth. It shattered on the floor. She stopped and tried to take a deep breath. Ali moved in to start cleaning the tea leaves and shattered porcelain.
“Who’s going to make me feel safe again.” She hated the way she sounded like a child. It was a register of her voice that made her cringe, no matter that it was involuntary. It sounded weak and broken. Ali left the pieces in a pile and stood behind her.
“Nahri, you don’t have to stay here alone, I wish you didn’t insist on it. You can stay with Jamshid, Fiza, even Subha and her husband or with Razu and Elashia. I would give anything to take you with me, you know that.” It was the worst thing he could’ve said, and he knew it right as it left his lips.
“Nahri, I’m sorry that was a stupid thing to say.”
Nahri looked at her hands gripping the counter.
“I truly wish you the best of luck.” Nahri nodded and then looked at him, a smile pasted on her face. She just wanted him to leave. He told her what he had come to tell her, she was too tired and groggy to even digest it completely, and so she just wanted him to disappear, so maybe it would all follow suit.
“Nahri, don’t.” He shook his head, frustration building in his eyes. “Talk to me, please.”
“I have nothing to say to you right now Ali.” She bent down to get the mess and he met her there, crouching in front of her, their fingers ramming into each other as they both picked the pieces up. There was something like static electricity each time their fingers touched, and his scent filled her nose, freshwater in the sunshine, a musky oil she knew he always put on before seeing her, to cover the smells of the day. It was a zap straight to her brain, she couldn’t think straight.
“Just tell me all that you’re feeling. I want to talk this through, we don’t have to argue, we can just talk about it calmly, can’t we?” They cleared the mess and Nahri went back to getting the tea started. She didn’t really want it anymore but she needed something to do with her hands. She needed to buy herself time to reorder her thoughts.
“You know, I don’t think I should go. I’ll just stay here and send some messengers. You’re right, about there probably being no trace left. Maybe I can send a message to Aquisa and Zanyab, though I really wouldn’t want to involve anyone else in such a mess.”
“I can’t listen to your ramblings any more, Ali. You can have a cup of tea and then bid me goodnight.”
“I’m sorry Nahri, I just don’t know what the right thing is here. I don’t want to cause you any more frustrations.”
She laughed again, pouring the tea.
“See, now don’t just laugh, Nahri, tell me how you really feel.” He took the tea cups from her and brought them to the table. There was a focused aggression about his movements. He pulled a chair out for her and sat across from it. Nahri gripped the back of the chair and stayed standing.
“I’m upset. You want to know how I feel, well there it is. Everything you’ve told me so far is pretty much the last thing I want to hear tonight. I had a nightmare about ghouls- and you- and drowning- and- and the dagger in my chest.” She took a breath, steadying herself. “Then you come in here and tell me you’re going to leave me to go hunt down some ghouls and ifrit all by yourself. You tell me this late at night, giving me no choice but to accept it and be happy for you to go. And then you throw it in my face that I can never leave here. So enjoy your freedom, enjoy Bir Nabat, enjoy your little mission to find the ifrit, and honestly just fuck off.” Nahri shoved the chair into the table and turned her back on him to go back to bed. To hell with him. She could hear him tell her to stop, to wait. He followed her up the stairs, and as they reached the landing, he finally put a hand on her arm.
“Nahri please,” his voice was shocked, hurt at the strong words she had thrown. “I’m sorry for the things I’ve said to make you so angry, but I’m not leaving you, I won’t leave it like this,”
She turned to look at him, tears along her lower lids. “Why can’t you? I’m so tired Ali.” She wanted to see how serious he was. He exhaled, looking lost or maybe defeated, and she leaned her head against his chest, pushing against him gently, like a ram with horns. He gently pulled at her shoulder and she picked her head up. He clasped her chin and kissed her abruptly. She froze, she was so caught off guard. They hadn’t kissed in years. But then she fell back in to him again, kissing back. It was an aggressive kiss, but painless. There was frustration and years of tension. It almost made her want to give in to her tears. Ali held her by the elbows, like at any moment he would push her back away from him. They both broke away at the same time, breathing in each other for a short moment before Nahri interjected before he could speak.
“Don’t say anything.” She whispered. She could sense the struggle within him, wanting desperately to talk it all away, but she desperately wanted to hold the moment. He rested his forehead against hers. She slid her arms from his hands and then brought him in for a hug.
“Nahri.” He started, his body rigid under her squeeze.
“Just let me have this. You can pretend it didn’t happen or pray for forgiveness, I don’t care, but just let me keep it for myself.” She released him. “I’m not going to tell you to stay, so you better just get going.” They both knew what she meant.
“I won’t be long at all. I won’t do anything risky. I’ll be thinking about you and missing you every day, and before you know it I’ll be back.”
“Ali, I’ll be fine. Next time don’t spring this on me in the middle of the night, making it sound so dangerous and giving me no say. You get so passionate and it comes out the wrong way, its like you like to see me angry sometimes.”
“You’re right, I don’t know what got into me tonight. I lost my head, and it won’t happen again I promise. You didn’t deserve any of that. Let me go get your tea, and then I’ll leave you.” He rushed away before she could say anything to argue. She laid back in her bed. Ali came in with the tea, placing it by her bedside with a biscuit he must have scrounged from her cupboard. The small gesture, proving how well he knew her, made her belly fill with butterflies.
“Can I get you anything else before I go?” She couldn’t ask him what she wanted to ask him. She looked at him, imagining his reaction anyway.
“Um, I think I’m fine. Thank you.” Her voice was quiet. He stood there still staring at her, like he was fighting his own mental battle.
“I’m not leaving for a few more hours, just before dawn. If you wanted, and you were comfortable, I could stay here until you fell asleep.” His voice was just a whisper now, matching hers. She hadn't expected the offer, but it wasn’t completely surprising.
“No, you couldn't, the couch is unbearable to lay on, you need some sleep before your travels.” He walked closer to the bed and sat on the edge of it. His throat bobbed.
“I meant that I could maybe stay up here with you, stave off your nightmares, if you’d be okay with that.” And there, it had turned from a favor into a request.
“Of course Ali, you know I won’t bite.” She smiled, trying to soften him.
“Just this once, I feel like it will help us both, I won’t bite either, I won’t bother you at all. I’ll just be here to make you feel safe.” He went to lay down on the other side of the bed, over her covers, quickly as though he knew he might change his own mind if he didn’t settle down soon.
She reached out to squeeze his hand.
“Goodnight. And if I fall asleep before you leave, I love you.”
“I love you. Sweet Dreams.”